Tuesday, January 26, 2016

Davos!

I really want to vacation in Davos next year....I'm hooked.  I'm a groupie.  I simply don't know where I could possibly find more entertainment value for my buck.  It puts Vegas & Disney World to shame.   It's the economist's version of the Super Bowl....what a hoot!

Thanks to Bloomberg we non-erudites can get a tiny glimpse of what it must be like to have unfettered access to the inner circle. 

Upon returning from his trip to Davos, Fortune's Alan Murray made the observation that "The markets are not predicting recession.  Among the CEOs here, there is little evidence of panic".  Alan's assessment is absolutely spot on and expected.  A propensity to panic rarely appears in the DNA of the typical CEO or Investment Banker.  Why would they panic?  So....what's the problem?

Here it is in a nutshell....China's facade economy and markets are now firmly, irreversibly intertwined with the (slightly) less spurious finances of the West,  It's complex, but here's a chart of the Shanghai Composite over the last month.


Interactive Chart URL

There's been a 23% decline in the last month and a 50% decline from the all time high set about seven months ago (6/12/15).  When this whole mess began to unravel, there were roughly $3 Trillion in US & EU ADRs, Bonds, Bank financing, etc. as well as an indeterminable level of derivative (off balance sheet) risk tied specifically to China's economy and markets.

Yet, everything, according to the experts, as it's being discussed in Davos, is just fine.  That, of course, is to be expected.  I wouldn't want my skydiving instructor breaking out in a cold sweat screaming "we're all going to die!" as we plummet toward Terra Firma.  I'd want him/her calmly giving me expert instruction on how to fix my chute.  

Could you imagine Ben Bernanke, Hank Paulson or Tim Geithner sobbing, tears in their eyes, before Congress in 2009?  "It's all my fault...sniff....sniff....I wish I would have seen it coming....I'm so...so.sorry! .....WAAAHH ! 
  
Although the above might make for great theater, it's simply not going to happen  Even after the next crisis is upon us, we will all still believe that everything is just fine, right up until the point where our collective life savings is gone and they are foreclosing on our homes.  We will all be convinced that our bankers, financiers and politicians are meticulously in tune with exactly what's happening, will summon the "invisible hand-wave" and the world will magically revert back to the way it was pre-crisis. The folks in charge surely have ice water in their veins.  They were born, bred and trained to handle situations like this.  Unfortunately, for us mere mortals, it's difficult,(but not impossible) to tell what these titans of finance are thinking, unless we truly understand the secret code they implement in pressure-packed public forums.

To that end, we here at Deep Throat have spent years developing the ultra-high-tech, Dick Fuld BST (Banker-Speak-Translator....patent pending).  By deploying this technology we can drill down to see exactly how big the disconnect might be between our global financial Czar's perceptions; and the cold harsh reality of Main Street.  The BST gives us the unedited transcript, the straight-up,unabridged, no-holds barred truth, as to what these actors are thinking relative to what they are actually saying.

Here's a quick example of how the BST works on some text from Davos:

What Ray Dalio said:  "China has a balance of payments challenge...." (calmly smiling, indicating confidence and that all is right with the world)

What Ray Dalio meant: (BST Translation) "Geeeezzzz...would you guys stop printing money!  Stop building empty buildings and airports!....stop cooking your books!....you are killing me!  The RMB is going to blow up in my face and all hell is gonna break loose!  You better get your act together! ....(sweating, screaming...jumping up and down....defibrillator standing by.)

Now let's set the BST loose on the Big Dogs...

Below listed: a Bloomberg clip featuring some of the heaviest of the heavy hitters: Christine Lagarde, (IMF Head Honcho), Jiang Jianqing (Chairman - Industrial & Commercial Bank of China); Fang Xinghai (Vice Chairman of the China Securities Regulatory Commission ); Gary Cohn (Goldman Sachs - President & COO); Ray Dalio (CEO - Bridgewater Associates - Billionaire); Zhang Xin (CEO - Soho China - Real Estate Developer).

Feel free to view the clip (75 minutes) in a separate window while reading the BST translated text below. Hope you enjoy!  Isn't global-economics and monetary policy fun!

Francine Lacqua - (Bloomberg Moderator) -  "So what do you guy's think about the gigantic mess going on in China right now?"

ICBC Chairman - (Old Banker) - "China is the big dog now. In ten years the US & Europe will be largely irrelevant. US & EU policy is the main reason we're in this mess in the first place.  How long is this panel going to take?  I'd like to get back home to count my money..." 

Ray Dalio - (Hedgie) - "There are four problems that could screw me in China.  Debt levels, Economic restructuring, Capital Markets issues and Currency issues.  I hope these guys can figure it out.  I've got billions riding on this."   

Fang - (Young Regulator) - "The old guy is right.  The FED is killing us. That 1/4 point rate hike was a bitch.  Janet Yellen is the devil disguised as my grandma.  Money is leaving our markets like rats off a sinking freighter."  

Lagarde (Cool Snow Boots)  - "Yup.....China is in transition. (China is the 1st or 2nd biggest economy in the world depending on how you measure it......I want to make sure I keep saying that so I don't piss off the Chinese....they can't stand the Americans ....if they take their toys and go home the rest of this conference will really suck.)  The Chinese have gotta get rid of the crooks and the cooked books so we can trust the numbers.  This a communication issue....the West thinks China's numbers are real, but they're not.  If this were an AA meeting the Chinese government would be approaching the 1st step....recognizing that there might be a problem."

Gary Cohn (Smiling Goldman Guy) - "I agree with everything every Chinese official says.  I make a ton of cash selling the China dream to naive US investors and I really don't want that gravy train to derail."

Soho Lady - "China's markets are a real bargain right now.  My company is a bargain!  If there are any Americans in the crowd you should buy my stock!  My company isn't making money right now but eventually, some day we will!  We're renting all kinds of space to internet start-ups.  All of the buildings are filled.  It's awesome!  The economy is doing great too!  There's a disconnect between equity/stock values and real estate values that Westerners don't understand.  We just need more US money to really take off. We're all going to be rich!"   

ICBC Chairman - (Old Banker) - "All of this market driven, consumption economy stuff is a load of crap.  I liked it much better when people just did what they were told.  Communism has been berry, berry good to me.  We've got tons of empty buildings and idled steel mills and factories, but that's OK.  We just post old film clips and pictures on the evening news and everyone thinks things are great.  I can't believe Xi sent me here to talk about this stuff."

Fang - (Young Regulator) - "Volatility isn't the problem.  The problem is execution.  We're simply not executing enough rogue traders.  Like Mao always said, if you shoot one, the rest toe the line.  Our party leadership is the best in the world.  We will get this under control.  If I don't pay homage to our party leadership I won't advance and/or I'll be detained for an attitude adjustment when I get back to the mainland. We have the best leadership in the world.  Did I mention that?  Apparently we have to do a better job of communicating this to the West since I'm noticing Chris Lagarde is laughing about my comments."

Francine Lacqua (Moderator) - "Lots of regulators have quit recently...is the Chinese market getting too complex?"

Fang - (Young Regulator) -  "Of course not....are you kidding me?....this again is a short term problem.  Nothing can be too complex for China's leadership.  Sure, when I come to work in the morning I see rows of empty desks, but everything is fine.  That's a silly question."

Gary Cohn (Smiling Goldman Guy) - "The biggest problem is that China's books are cooked. We've been aware of it for years, but we can't make any money by telling everyone there's no future in Chinese stocks.  I mean....then we'd have to come up with some other BS dream to sell to American Investors and that's expensive and it takes time.  Better to make a quick buck and ride this pony till it drops." 

Ray Dalio - (Hedgie) - "The shell game is amazing.  A bad year in China is better than a great year anywhere else.  You gotta give these guys credit.  They came up with a Shadow Bank system and flooded the streets with RMB and found a way to protect the currency off shore.  (Ray also got a big laugh when he bashed the US political system.)  Authors note:  I have friends in Beijing who have friends who've received a "knock at the door" for speaking their mind.....I'm just saying.

Lagarde (Cool Snow Boots)  - "I can't believe we did the SDR thing.  What were we thinking?  They cooked the books and got us to think the RMB is actually worth something.  The RMB is the most overvalued piece of toilet paper I've ever seen.  When this thing crashes it's going to wreck the whole basket. Hopefully they can fix this mess before we're all in the dumper."

ICBC Chairman - (Old Banker) - "China is the economic locomotive of the world.  Haven't you been listening to me?  Everything is under control.  Why?  Because I said it is.  Our debt is OK.  We are reforming things that aren't OK.  So shut up.  We are the biggest economy in the world. The US is the second biggest by any measurement. "

Ray Dalio - (Hedgie) - "China can probably figure a way out of their debt problems if they do something soon.  But I'm really worried that these guys are going to drop a giant currency bomb on my ass, blow up my computer models and cost me billions.  Geeezzzz I wish these guys would get their shit together."

Fang - (Young Regulator) -  "Don't worry about volatility.  The stock markets are fine.  Sure they are 40% down from the peak, but they are 30% up from a year and half ago.  So don't worry, the markets are isolated...ummm....except for those $2 or $3 Trillion in ADRs & Bonds and the related bank assets and derivative exposures sitting on Western Exchanges.....ummm....glad I didn't say that out loud.  Anyway, the RMB will be stronger than the US$  in a few years.  Our fake economy has the fastest growing fake metrics in the world!  We have no reason to devalue....forget about the massive growth (4x) of our money supply and unregulated shadow banks over the last few years.   If anyone tries to short the RMB the PBOC is going to use it's FOREX reserves to slap 'em around. That said, China is totally stable and by far the best place to invest in the world.  We are committed to solving the current crisis.....I mean...uh.....all is well!....yeah...that's what I meant to say....there is no crisis....all is well!"

Lagarde (Cool Snow Boots) - "Volatility is OK.....but we have to let asset prices settle to appropriate valuations.  Throwing people in jail for selling stocks is not the way to go.  As far as RMB stability, the PBOC should step back, stop propping up the currency and and let the RMB go where it's going to go. God help us all."

Soho Lady - "I just want to remind everyone that China hasn't built it's huge FOREX reserves because of monetary policy.  Fortunately, for the last 30 years, China has had a compliant, obedient working class who are willing to bust their asses for pennies an hour to make cheap plastic stuff, phones. electronics and environmentally toxic products that US and EU markets have scooped up by the boatload.  Since Mr. Fang is here I'd also like to remind him of his promise to form a NASDAQ style "4th Board" stock exchange, with even less regulation and no requirement that businesses to be listed have any possibility of ever becoming profitable.  That's what we need!  Those Americans really know their stuff when it comes to launching crappy dog-shit stocks.  So let's follow their lead.  I've got a few IPO's ready to go....let's get moving on this." (Mr. Fang was apparently making notes on having Ms. Xin detained for questioning once she gets back to the mainland.)

ICBC Chairman - (Old Banker) - "Haven't you people been listening to anything I've said?  Everything is fine.  The RMB is worth what we say it's worth.  A fake currency is only as reliable as it's underlying fake economy.  Our fake numbers are as good as anyone's fake numbers.  We could have said that we are growing GDP at 10% but nobody would have believed it so we cut the fake number to 6.9% and we're still the fastest growing big, fake economy in the world.  Like I said....Everything is fine.  Let's move on."

Gary Cohn - "Let's go back a year.....last year there were only two currencies in the world that were strengthening....the US$ and the RMB.  It makes perfect sense that the RMB would want to join the rest of the world, decouple from the US$ and start to reap the benefits of the devaluation.  China will be exporting deflation all over the globe soon. I hope, for the sake of the world economy and all of the business we at Goldman Sachs do in Asia, that they take it nice and slow and don't pull a Switzerland and bust the peg overnight."

Francine Lacqua (Moderator) - "So Ray....how much do you worry about China's FOREX reserves?"

Ray Dalio - (Hedgie) - "I'm sorry Francine, give me a moment....I kind of threw up in my mouth a little bit when you asked that question.  OK.....In the past, when China has reduced FOREX reserves 10%-15% there was a corresponding devaluation of about 25%.  Again, that's been in the past.  But, that's about where we are now...reserves have dropped $500 Billion....some say $1 Trillion... but like so many Chinese numbers....nobody knows for sure.  So far the currency hasn't moved much. But, sometimes it's really hard for a government to keep control over its currency.  Obviously, that's why I'm really worried about a Chinese currency bomb getting stuffed up my boxer shorts."

Francine Lacqua (Moderator) -" So Christine, do you want another term as IMF chair?"

Lagarde (Cool Snow Boots) - "I can't believe you asked such a goofy question in this forum.  Let's move on."

Fang - (Young Regulator) - "There won't be any slowdown in GDP in 2016 simply because we can't afford to have our GDP drop.  If it drops there will be all sorts of financial problems so we can't have that.  We have lots of resources and can handle anything.  We are also perfect and don't make policy mistakes either.   Luckily, our fake GDP target is made up anyway so we should have no problem hitting it.  Now, I have to say, that some people are beginning to think that our GDP numbers are just not accurate.   This is simply not true.  For, example, tax collections (which you can't verify) went up 6.6% last year, so that's not too far from our 6.9% GDP target (which you can't verify either).  Ford sold a million cars in China last year.  So there you have it.  The numbers are right.  Did I mention that we also have great leadership in China?"

Soho Lady -"I'd like to add that the bulk of China's growth isn't coming from SOE's,  It's coming from the private sector (me), financed by shadow debt.  (which can't be verified either).  We need to have more access to capital and we need policy that will support this growth, otherwise we won't be able to pay our bills.  Since none of our businesses actually make any money we need more capital to stay in business.  I can't afford to throw up any more empty buildings so now I'm just renting my space to Internet start-ups and if these businesses start to fail I won't be able to collect the rent."

Fang - (Young Regulator) -"I agree that small business is important, but I can't move up the party ladder if I let these folks go crazy.  Keep in mind that China's growth is fueled by domestic savings.  So Chinese citizens will continue to save their money and we'll allocate it into whatever we think is best for them and they will comply.  Then we'll drop a currency bomb, all of their savings will be worth half as much in global terms, but they won't even know what hit 'em 'cuz most consumer prices are regulated and the Chinese consumer doesn't spend money anyway.  So we've found yet another way to  screw over the Chinese working class.  I love capitalism!  God Bless America!"

ICBC Chairman - (Old Banker) -"I got it...I got it.....ya, ya, ya....Small business, growth engine, green energy, save the planet, human rights, increased standard of living....got it.....no problem....I really miss Chairman Mao."

Francine Laqcua (Moderator) - "So Ray, how long do you think it will be before China assumes the role of the growth engine of the world, like the United States used to be."

Ray Dalio - (Hedgie) - "Are you kidding me?  I'm just trying to get through the next couple of years without going broke.  We are up to our asses in alligators."

Gary Cohn - "That's right.  I agree with everyone.  The FED is out of step, they are working on an outdated model.  Everything is digital now.....I use the word digital when I want to sound really smart and cool. Anyway, US Interest rates are going up even if there's no serious wage inflation.  US jobs are going overseas to Bangalore, China, etc.  and the FED is raising rates.  America is screwed.  If we can just keep the charade going for a few more years I'll be retired and living on an island somewhere.  This whole mess will be somebody else's problem."

Francine Laqcua (Moderator) - "Final Thoughts?"

ICBC Chairman - (Old Banker) "Everything is just fine in China.  I just wish everyone else in the US and the EU would get their act together.  What time does my jet leave?  Can I get dim sum on the plane?..."

Lagarde (Cool Snow Boots) - "China (the worlds 1st or 2nd biggest economy depending on how you measure it) has to admit they have a mess on their hands, get their numbers right and put some of the crooks in jail.  Other than that, everything is on course and we should all be OK."

Fang - (Young Regulator) - "Ray said that China's a mess.  I must disagree.  What we need is more cooperation between major economies.  For example, we will continue to build your cheap plastic stuff, phones and electronics as long as you keep letting us list our fake companies on the NYSE and the NASDAQ.  Deal?  Also, Ray, you mentioned that China will be a drag on the global economy for years to come...what did you mean by that?  Are you out of your mind?"

Ray Dalio - (Hedgie) - "Look kid...all I was saying is that you've gotta get your act together.  Make a new plan Stan.....get on the bus Gus.  This thing is about to go biblical....hell fire, brimstone, angels & demons type of crap.  You need fiscal stimulus and monetary easing.  There shouldn't be any central bank in the world, except maybe the Bank of England, just because they are the Brits and they like to be different.... that should be tightening right now....and you guys are about to build a giant currency wall...and it ain't gonna be built by Mexico.  So what are you gonna do???"

Fang - (Young Regulator) - "We have great leadership.  We will handle it...."

Ray Dalio - (Hedgie) - "You knuckleheads are going to cost me billions.  I'm screwed....." (Steam coming out of his ears...)

Gary Cohn - "Again, I agree with all of the Chinese panelists on everything. There are no loose cannons in China.  Did you hear that the Chinese have great leadership?  Please, for the love of all that is holy, please let me keep playing in your sandbox."

Soho Lady - "I think we need to focus on the long term and not pay any attention to any of the vacant, insolvent projects I'm running.  If we look at the long term nobody will see the financial mess I've gotten myself into."

Ray Dalio - (Hedgie) - "Hey....don't I get a final comment?"

Francine Lacquar (Moderator) - "I'm sorry Ray....we've run out of time and you've said quite enough already.  That's all from Davos!"

.  







Saturday, January 2, 2016

The "Valuation Problem" revisited......

Over the weekend my wife and I went to see the Michael Lewis movie, The Big Short.   The book was outstanding, but the movie was actually even more entertaining.  If you've not seen it, I'll give it a "Three Thumbs Up". This movie would have been an unbelievable, un-watchable, silly, absurd work of fiction and unworthy of any Hollywood blockbuster hype, that is, if it were not for the fact that it actually happened. Star Wars was playing in the theater across the hall and if we hadn't all lived through the financial crisis, seen it with our own eyes and experienced the aftermath through our brokerage accounts, we'd think the Star Wars plot might be a bit more plausible.

I normally don't do movie reviews, but I particularly enjoyed the portrayals of Mark Baum (Steve Carell), Michael Burry (Christian Bale), Jamie Shipley, Charlie Geller and the cast of "Independent thinkers" who dared to bet against the system during the period leading up the 2008/2009 financial crisis.  There were several memorable scenes which apply to today's topic:
  • Michael Burry instructs a new hire to pull the lists of mortgages and data making up a Mortgage Backed Security (MBS) and discovers that, based on the data, most of the mortgages supporting the AAA rated MBS are likely to default.
  • Mark Baum interviews Florida mortgage brokers, a Realtor and their customers, including a stripper who owns five homes and a condo she bought with no money down, using adjustable rate mortgages.  The mortgage brokers bragged about how they "just got people to sign up" for NINJA loans (No Income, No Job or Assets).  Volume was through the roof.  
  • Mark Baum questioning a Standard & Poors official on how she can give a AAA rating to certain bonds?  Her explanation was that "If we don't give the bond a AAA rating they'll go to Moody's".  At the time, AAA ratings were apparently for sale if the price was right.
  • Selena Gomez and Dr. Richard Thaler explaining Synthetic CDOs using Blackjack hands.  "A CDO is like making a leveraged bet on the outcome of another leveraged bet".
  • Mark Baum discovering  “So mortgage bonds are dog shit. CDOs are dog shit wrapped in cat shit.”.
It was clear, at least to those who were looking for it, that the bubble of all bubbles was forming.

Last year, on December 24th, 2014 I had posted "The Valuation Problem...."   At the time I was concerned about the proliferation of non-investment grade (my opinion) securities making their way into mutual funds, pension funds, ETF's, etc.  After a review of the numbers, I'm sad to report, not much has changed since last year, or for that matter, since 2007.

Here are a few summary bullet points about the current valuations of the eight-hundred-and-twenty-six (826) Technology Stocks making up that category in Google Finance.  (Detail Data Below: Send me an e-mail or a comment and I'll be happy to send you the full Excel spreadsheet)

1.) Of the 826 businesses - 396 have no earnings (i.e. losses).

2.)The "Top 20" (sorted by earnings) have a Market Cap of just over $3Trilllion with a P/E of 18.2.

3.)The remaining 806 businesses have virtually no earnings. ($2.3T mkt cap $33 billion in earnings)

4.) The aggregate PE for these 806 businesses is 71.4.  i.e.) The current stock price is equal to 70+ years of current earnings.

5.) 247 of these businesses lost more than $10 million last year.

6.) Three of the businesses posted losses of more than $1 Billion (Sunedison, Sony and JD.com)

7.) JD.com won the prize for futility.....losing nearly $2 billion

8.) Fifty-five (55) of the businesses are ADRs (foreign stocks listed on US exchanges). i.e.) Filed under IFRS accounting rules with offshore management insulated from SEC sanctions and regulation. The market cap of these businesses is currently $628 Billion. (Not including Alibaba) If you include Alibaba the number jumps to $830 Billion.

Suffice it to say, I'm less than enthusiastic about the financial performance of the above described $2.3 Trillion worth of US listed businesses and even less enamored with their valuations.

The "Top 50" and "Bottom 50" are listed below.




Now.....let's see who owns these....

 ....wonderful, under-performing, overpriced creations of the Wall Street Marketing Machine.  As an exercise, I've picked "every 100th" business and I've listed a few of their largest shareholders.  Let me know if you see a pattern.  I'll describe what I see shortly.



Again, these stocks were picked at random.  After sorting the population by earnings, I've selected "every 100th" business.  So, do you notice any patterns in the above, statistically invalid analysis of the eight (8) tech stocks?  Vanguard has a significant position in all but one (7 of 8) of these potentially "dog shit wrapped in cat shit" businesses.  Blackrock funds are listed seven times as well.  Many of the others are household names (Fidelity, Janus, T Rowe Price, Morgan Stanley, State Street, Wells Fargo, etc.) You might just have some money invested with these funds/managers. I know we do/did.  Remember the "Third Avenue" Fine Print.... post I did a few weeks ago?  How about the post on "Why Genius is about to fail....again...."  Liquidity is king.  A lack of same can be financially fatal.  

If you go through the complete list you'll find hundreds of businesses like INUVO, SGOCO, NCR, Synacor, Marin, JD.com, etc. where the IPO share price was much higher than (2x to 10x) the current quoted price. Most of these businesses have never made any money and unfortunately, they probably never will.  Investors in these pipe dreams have been, or will be, wiped out.  

Mecox Lane, a Chinese mail order catalog house is a poster child for this type of misrepresentation and hype.  Mecox Lane threw up a website and got UBS & Credit Suisse to underwrite them as "the next big thing" in Chinese eCommerce.  Tell me again how/why Swiss Banks are putting Chinese IPO's on the NASDAQ?  It would be really nice if we had some sort of "regulator", perhaps a "Commission", that regulates "Securities" and "Exchanges"?  That would be really nice.  One of their responsibilities might be to make sure that IPO's are not flaming frauds, but I digress.

Anyway, Mecox Lane went public in October of 2010 at $86 a share. ($130 Million)  .  Management recently announced that they were "taking the company private" for $4 a share ($6 million).  As usual, UBS and Credit Suisse pocketed huge fees and the insiders ran off with the IPO money. This fraud, make no mistake about it, that's exactly what this is, perpetrated by Investment Banks, has been repeated hundreds of times over the last few years. 

So how does this happen?  


"It's not a lie if you believe it to be true...."
                                    George Costanza

Most of us, follow the tried and true, Jeremy Siegel Stocks for the Long Run methodology.  Whereby we've been conditioned to invest in Index Funds, Mutual Funds and ETF's to take advantage of the supposed diversification, momentum and "long term" returns of the equity markets.   Unfortunately, we don't actually know what we own. When we invest with Vanguard or Blackrock through our 401k's, Mutual Funds and ETF's, we trust the money managers to make good decisions in our best interest.  We don't understand that we are actually buying shares in INUVO, SGOCO, NCR, Synacor, Marin, JD.com, or derivatives representing the behavior of these securities, et al.  (i.e. dog shit wrapped in cat shit).  These funds have to invest in something. They don't get paid to hold cash. (You can do that yourself.) They don't add value or produce returns unless they take on risk, so the above is what they've come up with.   As you might suspect, they also get paid a pretty penny through underwriting discounts/allotments, sweetheart pricing and, I'm sure, other interesting incentives for their efforts.  For the most part, we've all been been lucky enough to ride the rising tide back up.  We buy the dips, dollar-cost-average and just like what we used to believe about real-estate, stock prices "never" go down in the long run.   Everyone makes money.  Life is good.  This obviously works just fine, until, of course, it doesn't.  At some point, we are destined to become like Margaret in my "Fine print...." post.  We can't get our money back.  It's our fault.  We screwed up.  We trusted....but we didn't verify.

Don't get me wrong, I have no quarrel with any one of these individual businesses.  There is at least some chance any one or two of them could become the next Apple or Intel.  Conversely, I could understand it if a few of these businesses lost money and/or failed every year.  I can rationalize it as an underwriting mistake, an aberration or simply unexpected head winds.  My concern is that when the entire market is a misrepresentation and priced as if all of these stocks are all going to be the next big thing, there's a problem. At best it's systemic blindness and a breach of fiduciary responsibility, at worst, it's a criminal enterprise.  

So to get back to the original question:  Who owns all of this "dog shit wrapped in cat shit"?.....the unfortunate, probable answer is:

You do.

So what do the pros say about where we are today?

What do our bankers say?......why....everything is fine!...of course...

In their defense, they couldn't very well say that "we're in big trouble and there's a chance we'll be out of business next year"....that might ding their stock price a bit........here's a great CNBC clip of the world's best bankers describing what's going on right now:

http://finance.yahoo.com/video/best-bank-chiefs-talks-global-141329675.html

Now, looking through the lens of "The Big Short", let's run some of the above commentary through our official Dick Fuld - Banker-Speak-Translator (BST) - 2008 version.

Jamie Dimon: Because of the complexity and the structural rigidity, the EU will experience lower growth, but there are still great investment opportunities out there.
BST: Based on the current valuations, there are lots of stock-haystacks out there with numerous stock-needles that will withstand a global recession.  For the love of god please don't take your money out of the stock market.

Brian Moynihan: China will continue to grow by about 6% and that growth will be good for the world.
BST: We're dumping our China assets as fast as we can.

John Mack: There's been a hiccup in China but I'm long term bullish.  Would I invest in China now?...YES!
BST: Since the've started putting people in jail for "malicious selling" the markets can't possibly go down!

Tidjane Thiam: Switzerland is the richest economy per capita in the world.  We are underweight emerging markets and see tremendous opportunity in Asia.
BST: Thank goodness we have this opportunity! The global-economy simply wouldn't function properly if it wasn't for a bank like Credit Suisse, willing to jump in and purchase the seats in the burning theater.

John Stumph:  The economy is strong but the strength is regional.  Take San Francisco for example, Housing, Commercial Real Estate and Tech is booming.  But 150 miles South or West...not so much.
BST:  We are only writing mortgages in San Francisco.

John Mack: "Regulators are putting pressure on the system, causing staff and compensation reductions.
BST:  Yes....those damned regulators.  Why can't they just leave us alone?  They don't understand our business.  If everything goes in the dumper again, they'll just have to bail us out anyway.  So what's the big deal?

John Mack:  I love businesses like Lending Club (LC)...which I'm involved in...they are going to take business away from the banks.
BST: There will always be a surplus of "dumb money" and people willing to spend it for them.  As a banker, it's my job to match them up in a most effective manner, while, of course, pushing my risk along to some unsuspecting sucker and charging usurious fees along the way.

In the midst of all of this "everything is fine" rhetoric there is no question that the industry is pulling in its horns. Deutsche Bank is laying off 35,000 people, HSBC 50,000, Barclay's 30,000, etc.  I've cut/pasted URL's below re: bank cutbacks, compensation reductions,  asset sales, earnings "misses" and other leading indicators.  Again, this is just a sampling of  recent press releases.  There's a lot more out there, and I'm relatively sure, more to come. Simply put, banks don't make cuts of this magnitude because everything is rosy.   They don't cut compensation and sell assets because they expect blue skies and sunny days ahead. They cut payroll, bonuses, jobs and overhead because they are in trouble.

Just for fun, here's a November 26th, 2007 clip from the CNBC talking heads.  To me, it's astounding how similar the discussion is to today's "don't worry, everything is fine" rhetoric.  The analysts are wondering how big the upcoming (2008) Citibank layoffs might be.  Charlie Gasparino was reporting that analysts were concerned that Citi had previously cut 17,000 employees and that if they continue to reduce staff, they might cut too deep "to the bone", hurting the long term prospects of the business once the mortgage markets recover.  They also wondered whether there might be layoffs coming from the other banks or if this was a uniquely "Citi" problem.  They speculated that perhaps Bear Stearns and Merrill Lynch might also be looking at layoffs in the near future since they have some mortgage exposure as well.  They also reported that Citibank could be looking at mortgage associated write-downs of "up to $11 Billion dollars on the upper end of the range".

Obviously, Merrill Lynch and Bear Stearns collapsed.  Citibank MBS losses eventually came in at $39 Billion (well above the $11 Billion consensus at the time).  The seventeen-thousand (17,000) lay-offs were insignificant compared to those announced so far in 2015 and tantamount to a rounding error when compared to the more than 250,000 bank employees who eventually lost their jobs in 2008/2009.  

Well....there it is.  We're just connecting the dots.  Here's the math:

MBS = ADS = Dog Shit
CDO = ETF  + Derivatives/Leverage = Cat Shit

ADS + ETF + Derivatives/Leverage = Dog Shit wrapped in Cat Shit

Again, the more things change, the more they stay the same.

HAPPY 2016!


Deutsche Bank to sell Chinese Bank
http://in.reuters.com/article/us-hua-xia-bank-m-a-deutsche-bank-idINKBN0UB17V20151229

Deutsche Bank to cut 35,000 jobs
http://www.cnbc.com/2015/10/29/

HSBC to cut 50,000 Jobs
http://www.wsj.com/articles/hsbc-unveils-overhaul-of-global-operations-1433824955

Morgan Stanley Plans Large Layoffs
http://fortune.com/2015/11/30/morgan-stanley-job-cuts/

Goldman, JPM, MS Cut Compensation - Layoffs planned
http://www.usatoday.com/story/money/2015/10/21/wall-street-bonuses-headed-down-layoffs-predicted/74235368/

Deutsche Bank CEO just went wild with the Axe
http://fortune.com/2015/10/29/deutsche-bank-layoffs/

Barklay's plans to cut 30,000 Jobs
http://www.businessinsider.com/r-barclays-plans-to-cut-more-than-30000-jobs-the-times-2015-7

State Street to Cut Jobs, Misses Expectations
http://www.wsj.com/articles/state-street-to-cut-jobs-misses-third-quarter-expectations-1445601119

Bank of America Results Fall Short
http://www.wsj.com/articles/bank-of-america-to-lay-off-more-than-100-employees-in-banking-markets-1443536677

Deja Vu - Here's a clip from November 26th, 2007 discussing bank layoffs in general - NOT AWARE OF THE GRAVITY OF WHAT WAS ON THE HORIZON
http://www.nbcnews.com/video/cnbc/21976981#21976981

Mecox Lane - Going private at 5% of IPO price per share.
http://seekingalpha.com/a,rticle/3778256-mecox-lane-will-go-private-at-95-percent-below-its-ipo-price?ifp=1